Harnessing self-determination for personal growth
How autonomy, competence, and relatedness boost motivation and well-being.
What really drives the choices you make each day?
Are you truly in control of your life, or are you driven by outside influences?
Could understanding your core needs change how you approach your goals?
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We like being self-determined, which means making our own choices and controlling our own lives without others telling us what to do. When we're not self-determined, it feels like others are making decisions for us, which we don't like. Our motivation is greatly influenced by how much control we feel we have. We’re more motivated to act when we believe our self-chosen efforts will make a difference in outcomes that are meaningful to us.
Three basic psychological needs
Self-Determination Theory (SDT) states that motivation, personal growth, and well-being are enhanced when three basic psychological needs are fulfilled:
👉 Autonomy: The need to feel in control of your own choices and actions. It’s about having the freedom to make your own decisions and having some control over your life. Taking responsibility for what you do is an important part of autonomy because it strengthens your sense of control over the outcomes of your choices. Autonomy is the main idea behind self-determination.
👉 Competence: The need to feel capable and effective in what you do and to improve your skills in areas that matter to you. It's about feeling that you are making progress and achieving mastery. Feeling competent enhances your sense of autonomy, as it reinforces the belief that you can achieve desired outcomes through your actions.
👉 Relatedness: The need to feel connected to others, to belong, and to be cared for. It’s about wanting meaningful relationships and feeling part of a community. Feeling connected to others support your autonomy, as it provides a sense of security and belonging.
According to SDT, a person's self-determination is based on how well their three basic psychological needs are met. When these needs are fulfilled, people feel more motivated, experience better well-being and higher self-esteem, and function more effectively. But if these needs aren’t met, it can lead to lower motivation, poor well-being and self-esteem, and trying to compensate for what is missing with things like greed, power, or distractions. For example, being overly self-critical and perfectionistic may be a way of trying to connect to others by proving competence.
To encourage self-determination in yourself or others, it's important to create a supportive environment that meets all three of the needs mentioned above.
Autonomous and controlled motivation
The level of self-determination in a situation can be understood by how much a person feels competent, connected to others, and free to make their own choices (this is called autonomous motivation). On the other hand, when someone feels pushed or pressured by outside forces or by others' expectations, it's known as controlled motivation.
Motivation is what drives everything we do. SDT focuses on two types of motivation:
👉 Autonomous motivation means doing something because you really want to, or because it matches your personal values and interests, and you feel like you have a choice in the matter. For example, you might study a subject you're passionate about because you enjoy learning about it or volunteer for a cause that aligns with your values. Autonomous motivation is the basis for self-determination because you feel in control of your actions and choices, driven by your own desires and beliefs.
👉 Controlled motivation means doing something because you desire external rewards, or feel pressured, forced, or obligated to do it. For example, you might clean your room because your parents are making you do it, or to avoid feeling guilty. In this case, self-determination is lower because your actions are driven by external pressures or a sense of obligation, rather than your own internal motivation. You might still have some control over how or when you do it.
It's important to remember that behaviors are often driven by a mix of autonomous and controlled motivations. For example, if you're studying for an exam, you might be controlled by the need to get good grades or meet others' expectations. At the same time, you could be autonomously motivated by your curiosity and interest in the subject. Similarly, if you’re training for a marathon, you might be motivated by the desire to impress others (controlled) while also enjoying the personal challenge and sense of accomplishment (autonomous). Most behaviors usually fall somewhere in between these two types of motivation.
Self-determined persons
The best way to describe a self-determined person is someone who:
👉 Believes they are in charge of their own life.
👉 Takes responsibility for their actions, whether they deserve credit or blame.
👉 Is autonomously motivated instead of driven by what others expect.
👉 Makes decisions and takes actions based on their own values and what they want to achieve.
Examples
👉 Imagine a student who receives a poor grade on an exam. If this student is high in self-determination, they will acknowledge their responsibility, identify areas where they need to improve, and develop a plan to study more effectively for the next exam. They believe in their ability to change the outcome through their own efforts. On the other hand, if the student is low in self-determination, they might blame the teacher for giving unfair questions, complain about the difficulty of the exam, or even give up on trying to improve, feeling that their performance is out of their control.
👉 Imagine an athlete who performs poorly in a competition. If the athlete is high in self-determination, they will reflect on their performance, identify what went wrong, and commit to more focused training to improve for the next event. They see the setback as a challenge they can overcome with effort. Conversely, if the athlete is low in self-determination, they might attribute their poor performance to external factors like bad weather, faulty equipment, or even luck. Instead of taking responsibility and working to improve, they may feel discouraged and less motivated to put in the effort to succeed in the future.
People with low self-determination often don't feel motivated to make things better. Instead, they might feel powerless and believe that nothing they do will really make a difference.
Self-determination can affect well-being
The type of motivation you have can affect how you feel while you engage in a behavior. Research shows that when people’s actions are more self-determined and less controlled by others, they feel more committed, stick with tasks longer, experience more positive emotions, perform better, and are more creative and better at solving problems.
A flourishing garden
A flourishing garden is a great way to understand self-determination theory (SDT). Just as plants need sunlight, water, and soil nutrients to grow strong, people need specific things for their well-being and personal growth: the freedom to make their own choices, a sense of competence, and meaningful connections with others. When these needs are met, people, like healthy plants, grow and thrive. When these needs are not met, both the garden and the person can struggle, showing less growth and vitality. By nurturing these basic needs, much like a gardener tends to their plants, people can lead lives that are both meaningful and rewarding.
How to increase autonomous motivation
Increasing autonomous motivation can greatly enhance your overall satisfaction and effectiveness in various areas of life. Here are some practical ways to boost this type of motivation by focusing on activities and environments that support your personal needs.
⚒️ Improve your self-awareness
Self-awareness is crucial for self-determination because it helps you understand your personal values, long-term goals aligned with those values, and motivations (why you are doing something), which leads to better decision making and autonomy. When you’re self-aware, you can make choices that match your intrinsic interests and strengths, boosting your sense of control and competence. It also helps you manage your feelings and behaviors and build genuine relationships, which fulfills your need for meaningful connections. Overall, self-awareness helps you make decisions that align with what you really want and need, leading to more autonomous motivation and well-being.
To become more self-aware, try reflecting on your experiences and feelings regularly through journaling or meditation, and ask trusted friends or mentors for feedback to get different viewpoints on your behavior and motivations.
⚒️ Align activities with your life purpose, personal values and goals
Aligning activities with your life purpose, personal values, and goals is essential for fostering self-determination and sustaining long-term motivation. When your actions are aligned with what truly matters to you, you experience a greater sense of autonomy and purpose. This alignment not only enhances your autonomous motivation but also makes your efforts feel more meaningful and rewarding. By ensuring that your daily activities resonate with your personal values and life purpose, you create a powerful source of motivation that drives you to pursue your goals with commitment.
⚒️ Create a supportive environment
Surround yourself with people that encourage and respect your choices and autonomy. Seek out relationships where you feel supported, understood, and free to make your own decisions. Be clear and honest when you communicate, and try to understand the feelings and needs behind any tough messages you receive. A supportive environment not only helps you feel more in control but also meets your need for connection by fostering meaningful relationships with others.
⚒️ Challenge yourself and seek feedback
Take on tasks that push your abilities and help you grow in areas that are important to you. Setting challenges that are just right for you can boost your sense of competence. Getting helpful feedback and recognizing your progress can make you feel more capable and skilled. This helps meet your need for competence.
By focusing on these strategies, you can enhance your sense of autonomy, competence, and relatedness, leading to greater autonomous motivation and satisfaction. Implementing these tips in your daily life can help you stay motivated and feel more in control of your actions.
Additional tips
👉 Track your progress: Keep a journal or use an app to track your progress and celebrate small achievements. Seeing how far you've come can reinforce your sense of competence and keep you motivated.
👉 Ask for support when needed: Don’t hesitate to seek advice or help from others when you're stuck. It’s okay to ask for support, and it can help you feel more connected and understood, addressing your need for relatedness.
👉 Practice self-compassion: Be kind to yourself and acknowledge your efforts, even if things don’t always go as planned. Self-compassion supports your well-being and helps maintain a positive outlook, which is important for overall motivation.
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Self-Determination Theory (SDT) posits that motivation and well-being are enhanced when three basic psychological needs are fulfilled: autonomy (the freedom to make choices), competence (feeling effective in our activities), and relatedness (feeling connected to others). When these needs are satisfied, individuals are more likely to be autonomously motivated, leading to greater personal growth and overall well-being.
References
Self-Determination Theory in Psychology, Verywell Mind, by Kendra Cherry, MSEd
The Role of Self-Determination in Well-Being, Psychology Today, by Tchiki Davis, Ph.D.
Self Determination Theory and How It Explains Motivation, Positive Psychology, by Courtney E. Ackerman, MA.
Self Determination Theory website
Three Key Elements of Personal Growth, Psychology Today, by Shahram Heshmat Ph.D.
Why Self-Determination in Loving Relationships Is Important, Psychology Today, by Jeremy Nicholson M.S.W., Ph.D.
