The peak-end rule: The remembering self trumps the experiencing self
We tend to judge past experiences mainly based on how we felt at the emotional peak and the end.
Have you ever had a great experience that was ruined by a disappointing ending?
How would it change your holiday plans if you knew that at the end of your trip all your photos, videos, and memories of it would be erased?
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Take a moment to think about your most recent holiday. What moments come to mind? You probably recalled the most enjoyable, the least enjoyable, and the final moments of the holiday, such as witnessing a breathtaking sunset, experiencing a long delay at the airport, or enjoying the final meal at your favourite restaurant.
The peak-end rule is our tendency to judge past experiences mainly based on how we felt at the emotional peak and the end, rather than considering the entire experience as a whole.
This cognitive bias influences our retrospective judgements of past experiences and our decisions about pursuing or avoiding similar future experiences. The rule applies to both positive and negative emotional peaks (the most intense moments) and endings. We tend to give more attention and weight to negative moments due to our intrinsic negativity bias.
From an evolutionary point of view, our brains are not adapted to store how we felt at each moment of an experience or to retain the sum total of our feelings. Instead, it is more efficient to prioritise the elements crucial for survival and reproduction: how good or bad an experience felt at its emotional peak and its end. Remembering these moments helped our ancestors to pursue or avoid similar experiences in the future, such as avoiding predators, finding rich sources of food or bonding with a mate. This selective memory strategy allowed them to make better decisions that enhanced their chances of survival and reproductive success.
Examples of the peak-end rule
👉 In 1993, scientists studied people undergoing colonoscopies, which were quite painful at the time. Half of the participants had a standard colonoscopy, where the tube was removed at a very painful moment, leading to a very unpleasant memory. The other half had a colonoscopy where the tube was held still for an additional three minutes at the end, which made the ending less painful. These extra uncomfortable minutes obviously made the total colonoscopy experience more painful. However, because the tube was now removed at a less painful moment, the participants remembered the experience more positively and were more likely to come back for future colonoscopies. This suggests that they paid less attention to the duration of the procedure (duration neglect) and were more affected by the intensity of the pain at the end.
👉 In another study, participants immersed one hand in painfully cold water for sixty seconds. Several minutes later, they immersed their other hand in water of the same temperature. After sixty seconds the water was slightly warmed to ease the pain for the next thirty seconds. Participants were then asked whether they wanted to repeat the first or second trial.
To prevent the sequence of experiences from influencing their choice, half of the participants experienced the 60-second trial first and the 90-second trial second, and the other half experienced them in reverse order. Although the 90-second trial involved more total pain, 80% of the participants who felt less pain during its final phase chose to repeat it. The rules of memory dictated that they least disliked the longer trial due to the reduced pain at the end.
👉 More is sometimes less. During an experiment on Halloween night, some trick-or-treaters were randomly given a very pleasant treat: a large Hershey's chocolate bar. Others received the same chocolate bar followed by a mildly pleasant treat: a piece of gum. Surprisingly, the children who received both treats were significantly less happy with them than the children who received only the chocolate bar! This experiment, along with many others, demonstrates that two positive items can receive a lower overall rating than a single positive item if the second item is less positive than the first.
👉 An unsatisfying ending can ruin the memory of an otherwise good experience, even though it cannot alter the experience itself because it has already happened. For example, the memory of a film or series with a captivating storyline and compelling characters can be spoiled by an unsatisfactory ending, leaving the audience feeling cheated and disappointed. Similarly, the memory of a delicious meal at a renowned restaurant can be ruined by a disappointing dessert that fails to meet expectations. In the same way, the memory of a loving and supportive long-term relationship can be tarnished by a bitter breakup, such as one caused by infidelity or betrayal, leaving one or both partners with memories that overshadow the years of shared happiness.
The experiencing self and the remembering self
To understand the implications of the peak-end rule on the decisions we make, it is helpful to think of ourselves as having two distinct aspects.
👉 The experiencing self is the part of us that lives in the present moment, feeling emotions based on current internal and external events. This self answers the question: ‘How do I feel now?’
👉 In contrast, the remembering self is the part of us that recalls past experiences, storing memories for future reference. This self answers the question: ‘How did the overall experience feel?’
Although both selves refer to the same individual, it is useful to consider them as distinct selves with their own unique perspectives and interests.
All that remains of our experiences are memories. The remembering self tends to recall only the emotional peaks and endings of experiences, often neglecting their duration and forgetting other moments. Our past experiences are retrospectively judged by the remembering self, based on these selective memories. It is these judgements that influence decisions about pursuing or avoiding similar future experiences. Although the experiencing self fully lives through the results of these decisions, it has no influence over the judgements and decisions made by the remembering self.
Decisions are based on memories, and these memories can be misleading. We may end up choosing activities that please the remembering self but are less enjoyable for the experiencing self than the memory suggests. Exciting activities like skydiving or bungee jumping may create exhilarating memories, yet they often involve intense fear or discomfort in the moment. Participating in endurance events such as marathons can leave lasting memories of achievement and perseverance, but the event itself may cause physical discomfort, fatigue, and mental exhaustion. Traveling to exotic destinations can result in memorable experiences, such as witnessing natural or architectural wonders or observing wildlife in their natural habitat. However, it may also involve challenges such as jet lag, travel fatigue, or unexpected mishaps.
The remembering self chooses future holidays based on the memories of previous ones. Creating memories is often a key goal of holidays, as evidenced by the countless photos taken by many tourists. How would it affect your holiday plans if you knew that at the end of your next holiday, all your photos, videos and memories would be erased? Would this diminish the value of the holiday for you? Would you return to a place where you were happy in the past? Would you even bother going? Why spend a lot of money and effort if it doesn’t leave you with lasting memories?
If we aimed to increase the happiness of the experiencing self, we would likely change our usual behaviours. We would be more fully present in the moment, take better care of our physical and emotional health, and appreciate life's simple pleasures more. We would spend more time with family and friends, devote more time to hobbies and interests, and spend more time outside in nature.
How to utilise the peak-end rule
The peak-end rule indicates that not all moments in an experience are equal: we tend to recall how we felt at the emotional peak and the end. Here are some techniques to leverage this principle effectively.
⚒️ End on a high note
The end of an experience often holds more weight than other moments, aside from the emotional peak. Small changes at the end can significantly enhance the overall perception. Ending on a high note ensures that you and others have a positive lasting memory of the experience.
Practical applications:
👉 Events: Conclude events with the most enjoyable activities, such as a fun quiz, karaoke session, live musical performance, or fireworks display.
👉 Job interviews: Finish by asking insightful questions, summarising your strengths, and expressing genuine enthusiasm for the job. Follow up with a personalised thank you note or email to express gratitude for the opportunity to discuss the position.
👉 Presentations: End with something memorable, like a thought-provoking question or a well-chosen anecdote or quote, to leave a lasting impression.
👉 Customer experiences: If a problem occurs, offer a sincere apology, provide a satisfactory resolution, follow up to ensure customer satisfaction, and add a personal touch such as a handwritten thank you note or small gift.
👉 Opening presents: Start with the least impressive gifts and save the best for last. The contrast principle enhances perception by making the final gift seem even better.
By consciously crafting positive endings, you can significantly improve how experiences are remembered.
⚒️ Make behaviour satisfying or unsatisfying
To encourage behaviour that is good for you in the long run, add an immediate reward to make the behaviour satisfying. Conversely, to break behaviour that is bad for you in the long run, add an immediate punishment to make the behaviour unsatisfying.
Practical applications:
👉 Encouraging positive behaviour: Attach a small, immediate reward to habits you want to build. For example, treat yourself to a favourite snack after a workout, or enjoy a relaxing activity after completing a work task.
👉 Breaking negative behaviour: Introduce an immediate consequence for habits you want to break. For instance, set a penalty jar where you deposit money each time you indulge in a bad habit, or impose a temporary restriction on a favourite activity.
By making behaviours immediately satisfying or unsatisfying, you can effectively promote good habits and discourage bad ones.
⚒️ Include more peaks in your life
Staying in your comfort zone rarely leads to great memories. Make your life more memorable by embracing new experiences and challenges.
Practical applications:
👉 Try new activities: Experiment with cooking different recipes, learning a musical instrument, or practicing a new sport.
👉 Travel: Visit new places and immerse yourself in different cultures, languages, and sights.
👉 Challenge yourself: Push your physical and emotional limits with activities like rock climbing, public speaking, or confronting your fears.
👉 Embrace surprises: Stay open to unexpected adventures and opportunities.
By seeking out new and challenging experiences, you can create a life rich with memorable peaks.
⚒️ Focus on intensity over duration
When we judge past experiences, their length matters less than their intensity (duration neglect). Instead of extending experiences, make them more exciting and memorable by creating standout moments (emotional peaks).
Practical applications:
👉 Amusement parks: The entire day may be enjoyable, but moments like riding the biggest roller coaster or meeting your favourite character will be the most memorable.
👉 Events and conferences: Include exciting activities, unexpected surprises, or first-class service. For example, a fascinating keynote speaker or a surprise performance can make the event unforgettable.
👉 Experiences: Focus on creating peak moments that leave a lasting impression, making the entire experience more meaningful. This could involve thrilling activities, unique sights, or exceptional interactions.
By prioritising intense, memorable moments over prolonged durations, you can enhance the overall impact and enjoyment of experiences.
References
Thinking, Fast and Slow, by Daniel Kahneman
The Transformative Ideas of Daniel Kahneman, Hidden Brain, by Shankar Vedantam
Daniel Kahneman On Misery, Memory, And Our Understanding Of The Mind, Hidden Brain, by Shankar Vedantam
Peak-End Rule, Psychology Today, by Nir Eyal
Evaluations of Pleasurable Experiences: The Peak-End Rule, Psychonomic Bulletin & Review 15(1):96-8, Amy M Do, Alexander V Rupert and George L Wolford
