Understanding values and needs
This page covers the key points and links to my articles on understanding values and needs. Explore these ideas to better understand what drives you and how they shape your choices. Values and needs are closely linked—what you value often shapes what you need, and your needs can influence what you value. This understanding can also help you discover your life purpose by showing what truly matters to you and what fulfills your needs.
The articles below are focused on:
👉 Life purpose: Your life purpose is the activities and goals that make life meaningful and fulfilling for you. This is about what you do.
👉 Personal values: Your personal values shape how you want to behave and the kind of person you want to be. This is about how you do what you do.
👉 Needs: Your needs are things that are essential for your well-being and fulfillment, like emotional support, safety, or purpose.
All articles
🔗 How to figure out your personal values
Your personal values shape how you want to behave and the kind of person you want to be. Only you can decide how you want to live your life, so only you can determine which values matter most to you. Your values are ongoing—they don’t have a fixed end date, though they can change over time. Understanding the values behind a decision makes choosing simpler.
🔗 Harnessing self-determination for personal growth
You value being self-determined—making your own choices and controlling your life without others dictating what to do. You're more motivated to take action when you believe your self-chosen efforts will lead to meaningful outcomes. Strengthening your motivation comes from fulfilling three basic psychological needs: autonomy, competence, and relatedness.
🔗 Finding your life purpose: How to discover what you want to do in life
Your life purpose is the activities that make life meaningful and fulfilling for you. Your life purpose is your personal reason for being, your personal “why”. Your life purpose often includes several activities because there are many things you enjoy and find worthwhile, based on your interests and skills. It’s about what you feel is important to do with your time, not what others think you should do.
🔗 What you think you want is not what you really want
You might believe that what you want is to achieve certain goals, like getting married before thirty or becoming a millionaire within five years. However, goals aren't what you truly desire. What you really want are the feelings or experiences you believe those goals will bring—such as a deep connection with a partner or a sense of financial security. Identifying your true wants helps you explore different ways to fulfill them.
🔗 Developing your personal principles
Personal principles are actionable guidelines that help you live your life and make decisions. They should be based on and reflect your personal values. While personal values are broad ideals, personal principles provide specific, practical rules for everyday actions. These principles help you make choices that align with what you consider important, making it easier to act in accordance with your personal values.
Taking a moment each day to reflect on your experiences can help you stay true to the person you want to be. Consider times when your actions didn’t fully align with your values, and think about what influenced your choices. Reflecting on how you can respond differently next time allows you to grow and stay committed to your principles.
🔗 How to have fewer regrets in life
Regret is a negative emotion that focuses on yourself, arising from actions you took that you wish you hadn’t or from things you didn’t do but feel you should have. You often regret what you didn’t do, like not starting your own business or not studying abroad. This type of regret is often made worse by your imagination, which creates an idealized version of what could have been. Regret can also come from decisions that go against your personal values.
References
The happiness trap, by Dr Russ Harris
Man's Search For Meaning, by Viktor Frankl
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, by Mark Manson
Designing Your Life, by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans